Don’t get us wrong.  The editors at Bachmannalia fully endorse and support ex-Gov. Mark Warner’s bid for the U.S. Senate in Virginia.  And considering that Mr. Warner was one of the most popular governors in recent memory, worked across the aisle to turn a deficit into a budget surplus by getting Republicans to agree on sensible taxes, and that several prominent Republicans have endorsed him already, Mr. Warner doesn’t really need our (illustrious) endorsement.

Oh, and did we mention that he’s running against former Gov. Jim Gilmore?  Warner will win in a cake walk.  We have even bet some of our colleagues that Warner wins by more than 17%, and the polls are sustaining us right now.

Anyway, why all this?  Because it was recently announced that Mark Warner will give the keynote address at the Democratic National Convention in a few weeks.

All well and good, and strategically smart.  Obama has made a big push to win Virginia and honestly thinks that he will.  (If he does, it will be a squeaker).  So putting an incredibly popular Virginian on the stage makes sense.  Warner would, in fact, have been a superb VP choice, as his appeal would almost certainly have brought VA into the Democratic fold for the first time since 1964, and he has executive experience to boot.  But taking a Senate seat from the Republican tally is pretty good too.  But we digress.

Where were we?  Oh yes, Virginia.  Anyway, Mark Warner also symbolizes that underlying message of Obama’s about transcending partisanship.  Warner is a pro-business and very wealthy Democrat who has appealed to Republicans over the years while being moderately left-wing on social issues.  He’s pro-gun, but in a sensible and non-NRA “trigger locks?  but then they won’t fire immediately!” kind of way.  So, in the end, he brings a lot of valuable qualities to set the mood for the convention.

But, there is something to be concerned about…

For all his good political qualities, Mark Warner is NOT an exciting speaker.  Folks, this will not be Obama 2004 by any stretch.  We just hope that Mr. Warner has improved since one of his early speaking engagements, which we here at Bachmannalia had the displeasure of attending.  UVa commencement, 2002, and Warner was the newly elected governor, just in office a few months at that point.  Rather than talking about something exciting and interesting (see UVa commencement the year before, with the doctor who sequenced the human genome giving a seemingly-impromptu-yet-wholly-planned-but-nevertheless-hilarious guitar solo) or even generic like “follow your dreams,” Mr. Warner went into a policy talk about an education bill he wanted the Assembly to pass.

Blah.  Super blah.  And delivered in a monotone.

Ugh.

Mr. Warner, you are a gifted politician, and an asset to the Democratic party.  But please be sure to practice your speech, and make it GOOD!

EDIT:  Oh yeah, the title.  Basically it means I might not have to watch, and now I can go see baseball.